MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING: suicide, transphobia, cissexism, discrimination, #LeelahAlcorn
Why do our babies have to die?
Why do we live in a world where little trans kids want to die rather than live their lives?
Who is making it so unbearable for us to be alive?
We are just trying to be ourselves. We are just looking for respect, dignity, our true truths of ourselves.
We keep on dying for people to maintain their ideas, their boxes, their order of things, their wrong order of things.
They say, we would rather you die and us stay in our boxes. We would rather you die, because you don’t follow these whimsical Willy Wonka rules that never fit anyone anyway.
We would rather you die than us feel uncomfortable.
I want to live in a world where anyone, child, teenager, adult, someone who has thousands of wrinkles—where anyone realizing that their gender doesn’t fit these rules doesn’t want to die. Where every single person who realize they’re trans or something like it—where death doesn’t seem like a better solution than facing the trauma. Where it no longer seems like nearly everyone trans I know has thought about suicide, or attempted it.
When that has happened, it’s not a matter of an individual problem. Unless you think oppression is a series of coincidences.
I want to live in a world where we are welcomed and held with open arms by everyone, where our trueness of self is celebrated.
I don’t want us to die for the sake of cis people’s fear—their fear of discovering their own selves, their fear of toes getting over the line, their stupid fucking fear of gender being awkward.
Well, of course it’s awkward. It’s a coercive system that forces people into a rigid set of unnatural rules that governs nearly everything that someone does in order to maintain an oppressive hierarchy.
I’d call that awkward, maybe. Maybe discrimination is more awkward than your discomfort. Maybe suicide is.
If someone not fitting your idea of what their gender “should” be is awkward, just think about how it might feel when they’re dead.
Do you feel less awkward, now that we’re not in front of your face anymore?
This is why I can’t stop talking about trans deaths. I refuse to let us fade away. I refuse to let our deaths make us disappear.
We are here. We are here. We are here. We will be here, here, here until we rise like a glittery sun, until our fierce power and beauty spreads across the world.
We must keep on. We must move forward. We must get up every day and live, live. Because we are stunning. We are beautiful. We are handsome and dapper and kinky and funky and fabulous.
We give a gift to the world that they do not want to accept, but it is a gift nonetheless. It is freedom.
That discomfort they’re feeling? It’s the beginnings of freedom.
Of course, we aren’t here for them, though they should be grateful for us. We are here for ourselves, we are here for our communities, we are here for the glittery gorgeous right to be who we are and be safe.
Pride and love will keep us alive.
PLEASE CALL the Trans Lifeline if you need it: 877-565-8860 in the US http://www.translifeline.org/